While I encounter myself in between two girls on their own computers in Starbucks, I find a little moment in the day to actually feel creative, because I lack that feeling so much. What do I need to change my current life? That is one of the most intriguing questions I have to deal with these days. I wish these two, seemingly sweet girls, were there to relief the “kiss of death” every time it enters my mind. I’ve been thinking of taking the leap of faith but I’m too much of a coward to do so, nevertheless I’m really tired of this world. Before arriving to the coffee shop, while riding my rather old bike, a wild bus driver appeared, traveling to my direction. He must have been kind of stupid since he did not use directionals to warn me of his next turn. I thought he was going straight ahead and I was practically in the middle of that lonely road. He finally did his turn, along with a long and unfriendly stare at my eyes, as if he was telling me to fuck off. Really, what is wrong with these people? They aren’t really “trash” persons, but man, they sure behave crappily.
I don’t know what to expect of every new dawn, everything stays the same, and it’s so depressing. It really feels like I am alone, although with thoughts like “God exists, have patience and faithful, be strong, hold on”. It’s really confusing. My heart points at Him while my brain sees nothing, just a bunch of false promises and fallacies.
P.S: This day I had some sort of anxiety attack. Feels bad, man.
Copyright @ Davide La Rocca for the picture.
P.S: This day I had some sort of anxiety attack. Feels bad, man.
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